Parenting fuckwittery

Are parents now terrified of telling their kids off? The evidence from Sunday would seem to suggest that the answer is ‘yes’. As Adam and I stood in a futile queue to sit in the stands on Horseguards Parade (in the end, no one was allowed to sit in them), a few kids cheekily went through the railings and scampered up to take a seat. This caused some amusement to everyone but an irate security guard and the parents. All the parents whose kids invaded the stands were less than assertive in getting them down. Typical dialogue went like this:

DUMPY MIDDLE CLASS MOTHER: “Henry darling, would you mind coming down?”

CHILD SITTING IN STAND: [Sullen silence, shakes head]

DUMPY MIDDLE CLASS MOTHER: “Please come down Henry, the man [security guard] wants you to.” [In other words: please don’t dislike mummy, it’s the nasty man who won’t let you sit down up there, not me]

CHILD SITTING IN STAND: [Sullen silence, ignores mother with an expression that has ‘fuck off, you silly bitch’ written all over it]

DUMPY MIDDLE CLASS MOTHER: “I’ll let you play with the camera if you come down. You can take a picture!”

CHILD SITTING IN STAND: [Sullen silence, frown communicates that Henry isn’t impressed by this petty bribe and mummy can swivel]

NEGOTIATION CONTINUES AD INFINITUM UNTIL MOTHER IS PERMITTED ONTO STAND BY SECURITY GUARD TO PHYSICALLY REMOVE CHILD. LET’S FOR THE SAKE OF SUCCINCTNESS IGNORE THE FACT THE SECURITY GUARD WAS ACTING LIKE A COCK FOR NOT LETTING THE MOTHER UP THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE.

If Frankie or Mila did the same thing, I’d go ballistic. It seems to me that parents are scared of upsetting their children. They treat telling their kids off as a form of abuse. Kids don’t thank you for treating them as equals who have a right to question your decisions. And ultimately it’s no good for them either. What if Henry had fallen down the metal steps of that stand?