Introducing the digital divorced dad

Is this good therapy?

So here we are – the first blog. The question is whether I’m talking to myself or whether random people turn up and read what I have to say. Ah well, talking to myself could be good therapy! Maybe I’ll imagine I’m in one of those group therapy sessions and I’m surrounded by bigger misfits than me…

Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Tristan and I’m NOT an alcoholic. I am, however, an estranged dad, father to be, writer, digital ‘creative’, doodler, lapsed socialist, and dyed-in-the-wool Aquarian. I live in London and I'm just coming up to the grand old age of thirty seven.

Ah, but let me tell you about the real stars of this blog…

Mila and Frankie

My children from my first (and only) marriage. Mila is eight and Frankie is five. They’re a study in contrasts. Mila is very sensitive, empathetic and artistic. She genuinely wants to help other people and gets very upset if anyone is angry with her. Frankie is an enigma – on the one hand, he’s a straightforward boy – goes for what he wants with little subtlety. On the other hand, he’s rather secretive and manipulative. I love them both to bits, which makes living apart from them hard at times.

Emily

Emily is my girlfriend. And, as of Christmas Day 2005, she’s also my fiancée. We’ve been ‘stepping out’ since a few months after the break up of my marriage. This led to all sorts of turbulence in the first year or so of our relationship. I was pretty miserable, full of guilt and doubts about what I’d done, so despite loving Emily, I was very difficult to have a relationship with for long time. Thankfully she never stopped loving me and stuck by me.

The baby
We’ve got an addition to the family arriving, god willing, in July. We haven’t settled on names yet, but it looks like it’ll either be Ruby or Joseph. Emily’s had a tough pregnancy so far, suffering from hyperemesis (chronic morning sickness). Things are getting easier now though and we’re both beginning to take pleasure in the pregnancy.

Lucy
My ex-wife and frequent bête noire over the last three or so years. We were married for seven years, years I’ll never regret (although I know Lucy would probably say something different!) It looks like our divorce will soon be finalised, although a further Kafkaesque twist may occur yet!

That's it for today - tomorrow I'll include my top tips on dealing with divorce lawyers!